Part 31 of 31 Things Americans Should Think About Before Moving Abroad : Finding Purpose

Darien Wilson
May 9
3 min read

Why What You’re Moving Toward Matters More Than What You’re Leaving Behind

Are you an American in the sandwich years thinking about moving abroad? Chances are, you’ve spent a lot of time thinking about the United States—and the things you’re ready to leave behind. But what are you running toward?

I’m Darien, an American who moved to the Netherlands, and this is Part 31 of my 31-part series: 31 Things Americans Should Consider When Planning a Move Abroad.

And today’s topic—finding your purpose as an American abroad—may be the most important one of all.

Is sustainability important to you? Pictured: recycling in Hoog Catharijne mall in the Netherlands.

Finding Your Purpose As An American Abroad

One thing I’ve noticed time and again among others who’ve moved abroad is that the happiest immigrants are the ones who are moving toward something—because they were chasing something they truly wanted, whether that's love or a job or just adventure.

Moving abroad is a huge decision—logistically, emotionally, financially. And while it’s tempting to move as a way to escape something, the most sustainable, meaningful moves are rooted in something deeper. They’re about building a life that better reflects your values.

Moving abroad is a big decision. It involves:

Emotional readiness
Financial planning
Bureaucratic hurdles
Cultural adjustments

If your motivation is only rooted in escape, those realities can feel overwhelming fast. But when your move is grounded in clarity and purpose, everything shifts.

What Do You Value?

"Be yourself with us" Pictured: Amsterdam Pride Parade, August 2023. Rainbow flags, and a float reading "wees jezelf bij ons" — "Be yourself with us" Pictured: Amsterdam Pride Parade, August 2023

So I invite you to put down the moving boxes and sit with these questions:

What do I value?
What kind of life am I trying to build?
What do I hope will feel different when I get there?

Is it:

More safety?
Better work-life balance?
Greater connection and community?
The chance to pursue a long-held dream?

This isn’t just emotional fluff. It’s your foundation. Your “why” will shape your choices, ease your decision-making, and keep you grounded when things get hard.

A Tool to Help You Start with Clarity

To help you explore these questions, I’ve created a free resource: a Values and Vision Worksheet. But unlike most checklists that focus only on logistics, this one zooms out. It’s designed to help you clarify what you're moving toward.

You can download it for free here.

If you’re serious about moving abroad, you already have a million practical logistics swirling in your head. But before you tackle those, I encourage you to pause and think deeply about your priorities, your hopes, your fears—and what kind of life you’re hoping to build. It’s easy to skip this part. But in the long run, this foundation will make your move successful and fulfilling.

When you’re clear on what you’re moving toward, everything falls into place You make better decisions, with more confidence—and far fewer regrets.

Darien in front of the Roman ruins and Alcazaba in Malaga, Spain. Darien has blonde hair, sunglasses, a white scarf, and a blue and white striped shirt. — Is travel something you value? Travel to interesting destinations is one thing I love about living in Europe. Pictured: Darien in front of the Roman ruins and Alcazaba in Málaga, Spain in 2023.

Final Thought

Thank you for joining me for all 31 parts of this series. It has been an honor to share what I’ve learned and walk with you through many—but not all!—of the big, complex questions that often come with international relocation.

Did you find this helpful? Are you planning a move abroad? Work with me to make your move from a place of clarity and organization.